Just Joss...My Happy Place
Friday, March 30, 2012
Con Mucho Gusto
I am a person of strong convictions and deep passions, and when it comes to my family and friends I am a pushover. There is a part of me deep down that wants to be thought of as helpful and generous and so I strive to be as much help as I can. The danger in this lay in the fact that it can often lead to burnout. A person can only do so much or help so many and it is imperative to know when to say, "no." In the past I have been very bad at this, but with age I have learned the wisdom of declining a demand. When it is something relatively easy for me, I am usually open, but when the demands begin to take crucial time away from my own responsibilities, it's time to take a step back. How many of you out there have a desire to help everyone niggling at you every day? And how many of you have burned out because you could not turn down a friend? While I am a person who wants to serve, I am also and individual in need of service. If I, or any of you like me, allow myself to burn out, I can't help anyone if I am unable even to help myself.
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2 comments:
Story of my life :) It's sometimes really hard to know when you should stop putting your energies into those around you and focus on yourself. People like us need for those around us to be happy and healthy. We need it like we need laughter and love - it is a fundamental necessity for us. The down side being that we get burnt out, which makes us unhappy and can have negative health outcomes. I have become better at not overextending myself. I have learned, for instance, not to try to save people who can drag me into their problems. Never the less, I still have a long way to go in striking the right balance between service to those I love and service to myself.
Sooooo true Jossy! I too have had to learn (the hard way) over the years, to say "no". Sorry, I've got too much going on, and I can't do it. I truly hate when my calendar is too full, too crazy. I'm such an organized person, and a perfectionist, that I get stressed when too much is going on at once. I'm the same way as you...if it's quick and easy for me to do, I'll do it. If it's time consuming and something I'm uncomfortable doing, I'll say no. By saying no, I usually get an evil-eye or will upset someone, but with age comes the ability to say "oh well".
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